Of course I can survive on 400 calories a day....

Hondurans are not large people, not at all. To be honest most folk that I've come across so far on this trip have fallen far short of the 5ft 5in mark and very few have had any excess body fat to play around with. The few rotund people I have come across have clearly been wealthy and have tended to swagger around with an air of arrogance and entitlement that unfortunately we see far too often in these poor third world countries. Let's forget them for now.

Food in these countries, specifically the local, non-tourist oriented fare tends toward being extremely basic, simple, tasty and served in portions befitting a nation where anyone larger than 5ft and a bit is classed as an anomaly. Enter Forrest into the fray, 6ft 2in, a whole bunch of kg's and limbs wider than the average Hondurans hip measurement. Needless to say, I tend to be slightly larger than the locals!

Thus far it has been OK on the food side as I just order double what the locals would order. Restaurants love it when I arrive as they tend to do well out of me, while the local diners cast surreptitious glances as this strange gringo demolishing plates of food with great gusto.

HOWEVER, when taking a trip to a remote jungle/river lodge where dining options are limited to what is the dish of the day things get a whole lot more complicated. The scenery and location of this place are sublime.

The lodge is right on the banks of Rio Cangrenal which is the premier rafting and zip-lining destination in Honduras. The Pico Bonito national park is on the opposite side of the river and seems to be largely intact at the moment. The zip-lines take you over the river and through the forest and then back again, very cool. There are even some rock pools right in front of the lodge where you can chill out and you can also make a 30ft jump off the rocks into the river below and ride along with the rapids, awesome.

I used to have a very difficult team member in my previous life who worshipped food. It was the be-all and end-all of her existence! Nourishment was required on an almost hourly basis to the level where more time was spent on eating, preparing to eat, packing away after eating, purchasing yet more food than was actually spent on the job. I always said to myself, "let me not ever develop a food fixation" along the lines of what I saw in that instance. That was before I arrived at the lodge!

Dinner on day 1 after 9 hours on a bus with nothing more than a tiny sandwich to eat consisted of the worlds smallest piece of chicken along with some rice and beans supplemented by beer. Breakfast while a typical, local breakfast, extremely tasty and healthy was clearly designed for a 12 year old midget! Did I mention that the scenery here is amazing.......? Lunch never materialized and there was no-one to approach. Did I mention that this place is quite remote.......? By now the local fauna is starting to look appetizing! The frogs look fat and healthy, the pet macaw could be plucked and grilled, surely someone has has a spare lamb I could get my hands on?

So I grab my hat and water bottle and totter off up the road in the vague hope of finding something resembling a shop or restaurant. It is 2pm and blistering hot but the scenery is amazing. After about 40 minutes I find a village called "La Naranjo", possibly the worlds smallest village but a village nevertheless. It has a shop! Now one thing about Hondurans in small villages, they grow their own food, they are quite self-sufficient. The shop is more there for treats and sweet things, nothing nutritious or substantial. What looked like bread rolls were in fact sugar coated over processed chunks of pure starch. Man they tasted good, I cleaned out the shop!

Eventually I get back to the lodge smashed out on a sugar high, happily clutching my stash of food loot, jealously guarding it from the local cat who clearly fancies getting his paws on these buns. At least now I can see again, starvation has been avoided.

The lodge bar

Forrest is NOT emaciated!

Dinner on night 2? The worlds smallest BBQ'd pork chop along with beans and tortillas. However, I DID get 3 tortillas instead of the customary 2, bonus! I almost strong armed the food away from a tiny 11 year old kid here at the lodge who seemed to have more than me, fortunately sanity prevailed and I left her to eat in peace.

Did I mention that the scenery here is amazing......?

Loving Honduras!

Andrew

Copan - what a gem!!!

Being the somewhat jaded and cynical traveller I am, when someone or something tells me that a place is the number 1 tourist site in a country, the most foreign visitor friendly place on offer, a place where all amenities required by a foreign visitor are available, I am immediately wary.

Think of all the pathetically over-marketed, tout infested, tour infested under-whelming places you have been to. Brighton with a million people fighting for beach space on a rare hot sunny day, the incessant (2 for 1 dollar) kids that plague you for hours at Angkor Wat in Cambodia, the horrendously pushy touts in Marrakech, the pushy beer girls in Phuket, the list is almost endless.

Fast forward to Copan Ruinas in Honduras, THE number 1 tourist destination in this fascinating country. It is an impossibly quaint village nestled amongst low mountains a few kilometers South of the Guatemalan border in North West Honduras. The streets are cobbled stoned, steep and uneven. Buildings are Adobe or very simple modern with clean lines and nothing above 2 or possibly 3 stories. Prices are fractionally higher than elsewhere in the country but still at least 30% cheaper than Costa Rica. Very little English is spoken but people are very friendly. There are so few foreign tourists here it is almost as if this place has yet to be discovered. In simple travel terms, this spot is amazing!

There is zero hassle here, not from the tuk-tuk drivers, not from the restaurants, not from the souvenir shops and not even from the trinket sellers who hang around the actual ruins themselves. Yesterday when I walked out of the ruins towards the sculpture museum an old dude tottered over to me and very politely in English asked me whether I would like to pay $1 for a stone carving of a Mayan symbol of sorts. Not wanting to start carrying the extra weight of trinkets I said no thanks. This dude the says "OH OK" and trundles off. I have NEVER had such an easy exit from a curio peddler ever. I almost gave him the $1 just to say thanks for being so cool. Even the tuk-tuk's are regulated here, $2 to the bus station, $1 anywhere in town, prices double after 9pm, insane, how cool is this place!

I'm staying with the nicest old lady, not 1 word of English spoken but I now have enough Spanish to get by. She is so kind and helpful it is awesome to stay here. Her place is up on the hill and there is a great balcony overlooking a part of the village where I get to chill out. The room is diligently cleaned and put back together every morning after Forrest has messed it up, almost unheard of in a budget accommodation place, so cool. She serves a mean breakfast as part of the deal too, so cheap at $28 a night for private en-suite breakfast included. I wish I had more days here.

The ruins themselves are very interesting and are known for the exceptional quality of the Mayan stone carvings done in 2 and 3D relief on numerous stelae dotted across the park. There is also an amazing staircase engraved with hieroglyphs detailing Mayan history. Unfortunately is is degrading badly and is now being protected as much as possible so getting a picture is tricky. The history of the Mayans is a fascinating story for anyone with a penchant for Mesoamerican history. Do yourself a favor an do a google search on "18 Rabbit" and see what comes back. I'm looking forward to Tikal in Guatemala which is supposed to be the mother of Mayan ruins, should be cool.

There is a Macaw sanctuary just outside of town called Macaw Mountain where they rescue and rehabilitate injured or confiscated birds. Wherever possible these amazing creatures are released back into the wild, often the the free flying colony that live at the ruins complex. It was so cool, I got there early in the morning and was the only tourist on site. I had the ruins to myself and was surrounded by about 15 screeching, colorful birds flying overhead. It's almost as if they are saying, "yo dude, thanks for coming to check out the ruins!". They also have loads of rescued Amazon parrots and even owls, very cool place. Best of all, pukka home grown Honduran coffee from their plantation, $1.10 a cup, Starbucks, get stuffed.

Loving Honduras after leaving Tegucigalpa.

Hasta Luego.

Andrew

Guns, guns and more guns!

South Africans always like to braai(BBQ) for everyone else. Any chance, any opportunity the fires are going and carnivorous cravings are being satisfied. Copious amounts of beer and wine tend to accompany the protein onslaught. Generally 2 topics dominate local conversations, Rugby and crime. Occasionally cricket and the weather along with Joburg traffic is discussed but the first 2 topics tend to dominate.

It is a sad reality that almost every person in that country has been affected by crime, either directly or indirectly. The statistics are simply astounding with a huge amount not being reported at all. People live in their houses and apartments behind high walls, razor wire and electrified fences. The fancy BMW's, Mercs and 4x4's all have state of the art tracking devices and anti-theft mechanisms to try and prevent theft and hi-jacking or at least to aid in possible speedy recovery. All in all a sad state of affairs in a beautiful country.

HOWEVER, I have never seen a guard in a cake shop in South Africa and definitely not one with a 45 Magnum strapped to his waist. People here in Tegucigalpa have it way worse than Joburg or Pretoria. Everything is barricaded, some shops only operate through bars, you don't actually go inside. The firepower here is insane! The dude outside the lottery ticket office was in full combat gear with a military grade pistol grip pump action shotgun. The dudes guarding the fast food joints all have snub-nosed 38's , the guards in the supermarkets have 9mm parabellums along with spare magazines on their belts. Every possible building that may contain something of value is locked down behind bars or shutters or iron grills.

Walking at night in downtown is a no-no, walking in some areas during the day is definitely not an option. I hear that Caracas is like this now that Venezuela has imploded. What a way to live!

However in amongst this craziness you get to see a deeply religious side to the nation. There are a few really cool churches in the city center, albeit with electric fencing along the sides of one. What on earth is going to be stolen, the holy water, the incense?? Sitting inside one of the cathedrals i saw people in their Sunday best, posing for photographs in front of the alter with the friendly priest, all smiling and joking. People were genuinely having fun and celebrating the strength of their beliefs. Looking at this one has to wonder where the lawless element comes from. Why do these crazy people do what they do, poverty maybe....

Looking out across the city from the relative safety of the hostel balcony it is possible to see the basic neighborhoods that straddle the hills, a bit like Rio I guess. The hostel is situated in the 'safe' zone where the embassies are. At least one can walk around here at night although all the restaurants seem to be guarded too. It definitely takes some getting used to.

One last interesting note, the flight in from Costa Rica. Reading up on the internet it seems that the airport here provides one of the more challenging landings faced by airline pilots. Apparently things have improved but the number of hills and mountains are still the same. You know that the pilot is really flying the plane when even on final approach he is still in a tight turn, one wing way below the other one, engines being pushed hard one second and then eased off the next. Being sober did not help. When we were about 100m above the ground the plane was still not level and one wing was above the other. I was contemplating mortality at that stage but the aircrew looked chilled so all was good.

At the last possible moment the plane leveled out, hit the Tarmac with a thump and heavy braking ensued. It seems that added to the challenge of hills and mountains there is a relatively short runway. At least these pilots know their stuff, kudos to them!

Busses tomorrow, first full size bus of the trip so far. Should be fun.

Hasta Luego

Andrew

More sloths than you can shake a stick at......

Puerto Viejo is one of those places where you can get stuck and never reappear. A good friend of mine has been here before and told me to expect aged hippies and a chilled out, herbal infused environment. Never a truer word has been said.

When I used to go the gym at lunch time in Croydon, I was usually half stoned by the time I had completed the 100 meter walk courtesy of the Ganga crew that used to smokes tons of weed outside the YMCA which was right next to the gym. And people thought I went there for the exercise....

Needless to say, walking down the main drag here in Puerto Viejo I am transported back to lovely old Croydon. No-one seems to smoke normal cigarettes here, they are all of the herbal kind, purely medicinal I'm sure. I had planned on approaching a local dealer, parting with a few dollars and lighting up. However I soon realized this is all free if you hang out in the right place. I headed off to the loudest reggae bar, stood behind the Rasta with the biggest spliff and breathed deeply, man it brought back Croydon!!! I had a sudden craving for pizza after about half an hour bur luckily these folk know their clientele well. EVERYONE sells pizza in this capital of Costa Rican munchies. Damn it tasted good.

Talking about hippies, there is this really sweet old dude who trundles around on his red bicycle through town on what seems to be a mission that only he knows of. Everywhere I go, I see him. His scrawny hippie surfer limbs slowly pedaling his clapped out bike. His hair is down to his butt and his beard is almost too. He looks so chilled out I'm sure he has to remind himself to breathe every now and then. I'm guessing he stopped off here 30 years ago and never left. The lady who looks after the hotel in the evening here is the same, she came here a year ago to volunteer at the animal sanctuary and has never left. Must be the food and the weed, both of good quality!

So sloths! After battling to see them in the wild in Tortuguero I eventually saw a 2 toed and then a 3 toed sloth on opposite sides of the river. On the trip we also found an anteater that I swear was zonked on Red Bull or something. This crazy dude was literally frolicking in the trees, jumping, climbing and generally behaving like a lunatic anteater, amazing to see. I could not get pictures on the phone so they won't be on the blog. However I did get a chance to visit the Jaguar rescue center today, so named as the original rescue animal was a Jaguar.

This is the place where loads of people come to volunteer for a minimum of a month. Personally I think it is because they get to hand feed and play with baby monkeys and sloths all day long but what do I know. The young animals are impossibly cute and even stir an old cynic like me, especially considering how much I love animals.

There is a whole process from when the sloths are absolute babies through to juveniles and then adults which can be released back into the wild. Wherever possible the animals are set free into the centers own private reserve. This is very similar to Moholoholo in South Africa. These guys have Pelicans with attitude along with a crazy deer who spent 10 minutes licking off all the deet lotion from me as she has a thing for sweat. Man I was sticky afterwards.

Sloths don't do an awful lot, that's why they are tough to see in the wild. There is no movement to give them away. As you can see from the pictures of the busy teenage sloths, life moves at a slow pace. Fortunately I now have incredible close up shots of sloth faces taken with my 400 lens, happy days. I would definitely recommend a visit to this place for anyone planning a trip to Costa Rica, it's well worth the effort.

Well that's it for me in Costa Rica. I head back to the capital tomorrow then fly on Saturday morning to start what is arguably the most dangerous part of the trip, Honduras.

Right now I'm off back to the Rasta bar to freeloading off the dude smoking the largest spliff. Afterwards methinks pizza.....

Hasta Luego

Leaf Cutter ants are amazing little creatures

The more I travel, the more I realize how connected this planet has become and continues to become. Tortuguero is a fairly isolated place on the Carribean coast of Costa Rica. There are no roads, no cars, no motor bikes and only 2 quad bikes which are used to lug trash around. You get here by single or twin engined light aircraft or via a river boat from the closest pier about an hour away.

However while sitting in a pizza joint set amongst the palm trees enjoying a superb calzone with original mozzarella cheese made by a dude who clearly has an understanding of Italian food, I get to listen to some great reggae from 'Lucky Dube'. For those of you who may not know, he was a big South African reggae star in the 90's and 00's who was tragically murdered in 2007. How on watch his music ended up in an isolated spot in Costa Rica is beyond me but it was great to chill out to his specific brand of Rasta lyrics! They go extremely well with pizza and beer....

La Fortuna was a let down as it is a town that has completely given itself over to the concept of tours. You can't move an inch without coming across a tour expert who can get you onto a volcano, into a volcano, over a volcano, rafting blindfolded upside down through a volcano and so on. It's a pity as the scenery and general area is superb and quite easy to get to without being pushed onto an overpriced, poorly managed tour. Having said that, if you choose carefully you can find something interesting and worthwhile doing. I did the extremely steep hike to Cerro Chato volcano which in the dry season I would assume is superb. However in the rainy season it becomes a little challenging but great fun nevertheless.

After the round trip of about 5 hours you get to chill in the hot springs river with the locals in a series of rock pools that feel like natural jacuzzis, so cool!

The boat trip into Tortuguera gives a glimpse of the national park and the amazing vegetation that is being preserved and protected. Costa Rica really is trying to protect it's natural environment, Panama should take notes. The town here is tiny with a single paved walkway running the length of town, the High Street if you will.

The harbor is just a sandy bay at the edge of the river crowded with river boats jostling for position so they can disgorge their human cargo and make another run. It is peak season here due to the local and European holidays along with the fact that green turtle nesting season has started. Town is heaving with people passing through hoping to see turtles nesting on one of the nightly tours. I did a tour last night and although there were 5 green turtles on the beach over the course of the evening none decided to dig a nest and lay any eggs. We did however get to see 2 of these amazing creatures slowly make their way back into the sea after they decided that it was not the right time to lay eggs. These turtles weigh about 100-120kg and are huge! An amazing site to see. Walking back late last night our guide found a lovely little pit viper on a stick at the side of the trail, very cool.

Leaf cutter ants are everywhere in the jungle. You walk along being distracted by toucans, Hawks, vultures, humming birds and green macaws, sucked dry by an armada of blood-thirsty mosquitos and suddenly you see tiny triangular pieces of leaves moving along the forest floor. Welcome to the world of the leaf cutters. They use the pieces of leaves as food in a giant colony underground where the fermenting leaves provide warmth and food. These little guys go out in their thousands and do nothing but carry neatly cut pieces of leaves back to the nest all day long, guarded by their soldier ants. They are easy to spot, just look for a long line of moving leaves and you have found them. The longest line I found must have about 30 meters or so, not sure how many ants that translates into but probably too many to count. Man, nature is a fascinating subject.

Now if I can just find a sloth that will pose for a photo....

Hasta Luego

Andrew

Man, I love Landys!

As most of you know, I have a thing for Landrovers, specifically Defenders. Those amazing square boxes with the aerodynamics of a 2 ton brick, limited comfort and a selection of freely included rattles that require the installation of a substantial sound system to ensure that they are kept at bay.

One of the saddest days of my life was when, upon leaving South Africa for the second time we had to sell our long wheelbase Defender. We bought this vehicle from a strange dude in Joburg who lived in a fake castle, I kid you not. Apparently his daughter wanted to live in a castle so he built her one! Talk about being spoilt. Anyway, this dude did not care for the vehicle in any way and had treated it really badly over the years. We unfortunately paid the price and over the next 2 years we replaced more parts on the vehicle than Cher has had parts adjusted via her plastic surgeon.....

Steering box, water pump, front diff, clutch cable, batteries, ht leads, brakes, the list goes on. However this vehicle was a limited edition Landy with the BMW 2.8 V6 petrol engine and once I had the BMW racing garage in Joburg make the necessary adjustments we could drop VW Golf GTI's in first and second gear much to their disgust. Needless to say, this vehicle could go absolutely anywhere and we had loads of fun with it doing 4x4 trails all over the country. Fuel consumption, now that's a whole different story!

Sitting outside Casa Tranqulo in Santa Elena in Costa Rica I hear this rough sounding Diesel engine in the distance. I know that sound very well, having heard it many times before in Africa. Around the corner appears this clapped out old Series 3(I think) Landy and stops in front of the hostel. He knows the owner. The dude driving must have thought I was mentally deranged as I leapt up to take pictures and touch the wonderful machine that was clearly held together with cello tape and chewing gum, both of which were coming apart.

What a great vehicle, well color co-ordinated too, still with the original rims, awesome. After allowing my small epiphany he fired up the Landy and disappeared off in a cloud of diesel fumes, probably happy to escape the deranged Gringo hanging off his vehicle. Any country that has Landys can't be all that bad then!

Monteverde cloud forest - wow! Santa Elena cloud forest - wow. The primary and secondary cloud forests here are amazing. The bio-diversity is off the charts. The array of mammals, birds,reptiles and flora is just astounding. I spent 3 days, 6-8 hours a day wandering the forests searching for sloths and Jaguars. Needless to say, these forests are incredibly dense and the chances of finding these secret denizens are very slim. I'm sure I have whiplash from staring up at the huge trees looking for sloths which disguise themselves as moss covered branches. Sloths 1, Forrest 0.

I was however quite lucky and in the Monteverde forest I found howler monkeys, a coati, a strange looking squirrel along with some amazing birds such as a pair of collared redstarts. Google them, they are wonderful little birds. I found them nesting in a small mud hole at the side of the trail. Birds of prey abound and looking up in a clear area you will see turkey vultures, black vultures and numerous hawk species hanging on the thermals or using the persistent breeze to stay aloft. All in all a very pleasant experience and I would definitely recommend a 3-5 day visit to the area. Some of the lodges look very comfortable and have awesome views.

Walking the 6km back out of the Monteverde forest I came across a small coffee shop that had humming bird feeders in place. They were absolutely mobbed by these awesome birds and on numerous occasions I was almost crashed into by them as they attacked the feeders. Excuse the poor quality video, not my strong point.

Unfortunately my hostel was right on the main drag in and out of town so traffic noise from 5am to 10pm was constant. Easily remedied by heading into the cloud forest away from humanity. I did a night forest walk with probably the worlds most incompetent guide. I think he is related to the crazy Panamanian lunch dude who used to yell at everyone. This chap simply did not get the need for walking and talking quietly.  He also had the spotting ability of a blind silkworm. The only thing he found for us was a stick dangling from a vine high up in the canopy that he was sure was a monkey tail. Looking through the binoculars it was clear he had spotted a stick! Luckily his clients found a coati and an agouti and later on I found an amazing bat who just kept posing for pictures, no matter how close people got to him. He should have tipped us at the end of the tour.....

Off to Arenal and La Fortuna now to get the volcano and hot spring experience. So much to see and so little time!

Hasta Luego!

Hola Costa Rica

Be cool man, be cool! So says the Rasta boat dude while he kicks the 5 passengers off his ferry boat onto an already full ferry boat as he could not be bothered to take us from Bocas to the Panamian mainland. Of course Forrest gets the hump and gives him lip, me and my first world thinking.... Needless to say Rasta dude 1, Forrest 0.

At least we got to the mainland safely to start the overland journey from Panama up to San Jose in Costa Rica. It was very sad to see the amazing mangroves along the Panamian coast completely clogged with tons of garbage, rubbish of every type strewn everywhere in the water, on the sand, alongside the road, pretty much everywhere. It is such a beautiful area but marred by humans total disdain for the environment! I wish they would take pride in their country but I can't see that happening.

Cross the border into Costa Rica, poster child for Latin American conservation and wildlife preservation and it is as if you are on a different continent. Hardly any litter along the roads, grass verges actually mown in places, some of the houses even have garbage containers above ground in a sort of wire cage to prevent dogs from pilfering. What a difference to see people who seem to care about how and where they live. It almost restored my faith in humanity, almost. The border crossing was so simple, passport dude stamps you out, pay $4 exit tax, another passport dude stamps you in, job done, hello Costa Rica!

The lunch stop place was very chilled, a jungle type lodge on the edge of a deserted beach in Puerto Viejo in the far south of Costa Rica.

The sign pretty much says it all, be cool man, be cool.

So, let me tell you about travellers cheques . For those amongst us who travelled in the 80's and 90's I'm sure you will have come across them. Good old Amex T/C's, safer than cash, simple and easy to use, can be exchanged almost anywhere. Forrest decides that as Central America is a hotbed of crime, theft, pick-pocketing etc, some T/C's are a very good idea and can be used to fund the Costa Rica and Honduras part of the trip. Well, let me tell you, not the best idea. Only 1 banking group, ScotiaBank will change a travellers cheque. With a the help of my ever patient wife and the Amex call center we narrow down the potential branches to 2 in San Jose here in Costa Rica. I get the helpful hotel dude to phone the first branch for me. Lo and beholed they don't change them but wait, yes the second branch will change them. So now we have 1 branch of 1 bank in the whole of Costa Rica that will change the cheques for me.

Being the cheap bugger that I am, I decide to walk the 3 miles to the branch, no taxi is ever gonna rip me off, even if it is pouring with rain. I do question my own sanity some times! So after trudging through the rain for 45 minutes I find myself at the VIP branch of this bank, so far so good. I go through security, airport style, leaving a damp trail of muddy footprints on their lovely clean floor, clothes sopping wet, water dripping off me. No raincoat, no umbrella, moron... I ask the friendly lady in my best broken Spanish where I go to change my precious cargo of cheques. She takes one look at the bedraggled gringo in front of her and says "Cashier" in Spanish. Off I go to join the queue.

The dude calls me over and I present him with the cheques. Talk about confusion, they have clearly never seen these things before. He holds them up, stares at them, shakes them. I thought he was going to taste them at one stage. Perplexed he calls his supervisor over. She goes through the same routine, can't figure out what these things are, off she goes. Methuselahs Costa Rican cousin Pedro ambles out with her to assist. Yes he knows what these things are, yes he knows what to do and yes he will help these youngsters get them processed. Oh he remembers the good old days when Amex T/C's were the currency of choice, now it's just ATM cards, where is the world going to? After 45 minutes I'm the proud owner of a fresh batch of cash, sorted!

Just a quick note about San Jose. The surrounds are gorgeous, hills, forests and volcanos. It's a bit like Kathmandu, in a valley or a bowl surrounded by mountains etc. The city itself has no redeeming factors and is just a concrete sprawl full of people. There are no real sites apart from a couple of museums which in themselves are really good and enough for 1 day. Beyond that there is no reason to linger so with that in mind I head off to the Monteverde cloud forest to look for for sloths, monkeys and whatever else decides to come to the party. A couple of shots of San Jose taken while dodging the incredible amount of rain that falls here. It really is the rainy season, they were not kidding.

Hasta Luego